Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Randomize