his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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