No, drunk sperm still make babies.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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