im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Randomize