I heard we made out
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
