Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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