I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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