Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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