I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize