there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
