someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
