why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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