Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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