I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Come on in and take your pants off
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