So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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