the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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