all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
