Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
