I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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