I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
