he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
