I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
