R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
