I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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