I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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