I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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