This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
