I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize