Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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