I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Fuck appropriateness.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Hippo gnu deer
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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