if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
