as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
