look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
