you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
