she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize