im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
