Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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