I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Randomize
