were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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