my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
