It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
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My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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