Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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