I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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