How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.