So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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