I'm really into asian looking animals
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
We smell like vodka and hangover
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