the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Randomize