i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
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