can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
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