He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
