By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
